Friday, November 04, 2005

A house doesn't make a home

I took a walk after work along the river. What a beautiful city Saskatoon is in the summer, peaceful and green, like a young country girl, shy and lovely, hiding in the little corner of the world. I often feel I don't give this place enough credits. The cruel reality is in couple of months it will start snowing again. Then it will turn into this middle age woman with all the makeup washed off, cold and depressing. More beautiful it is, shorter it lasts. Sounds like life, doesn't it?!
I am moving again. It seems saying good-bye is what I have been doing in the last 10 years. I have moved from city to city, country to country, continent to continent. I have met many great people. Some of them have become very good friends of mine. Have you noticed that life is much more bearable when there are friends? near or far. I've learnt some precious lessons, most of them in a hard way. I often feel moving on. I don't know what I am looking for, home maybe? What is your definition of home? Some people say it is where your loved ones is. Have you ever felt lonely at home or when you are surrounded by people? Homeland is just the place where your ancestors last settled.
What would you wish for if you were granted one and only one wish? Lots of love? Lots of money? Health? On top of basic human needs like water, air, food and shelter, people need to feel they belong to something. People also need to feel free. I don't remember when was the last time I felt free. I guess as long as we have this physical body we can’t be free. Sometimes when I stare at the blue and unlimited autumn sky I wish I could fly, fly away. If I were granted only one wish, I wish to be fearless. Buddha said fear came from love. When you love something or someone too much, you fear to lose it. Stop loving doesn't seem it is the right solution either. On the other hand, love is one of most overrated things, so is talking about it. The only thing certain about love is it will end. We need whole lot more than love to live on. I'd better get some rest. I can see my cynicism is stirring up :P
Hey, for those of you who actually read this nonsense, you know you can leave comments too :P I probably will move again and again, but I will keep this little cyberspace. This way you will always be part of my life, and I will be part of yours.

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