The Story of V - Part 2

 

When V was only a 7 weeks old fetus I had a bleeding episode. It wasn't the normal spotting. It was the fresh blood gushing  bleeding. I remember I sat at the edge of the bed waiting for the nurse to call me back. There was only one thought going through my mind, "I've lost it'. I was pretty calm. At that point that whole pregnancy, parenting thing hadn't set in yet.

Next day I went for an emergency ultrasound. I was lying on the table not being able to see anything. In the middle of nowhere the technician turned the speaker on. Suddenly the small dark room was filling with a loud rushing-whooshing sound. I was puzzled for a second and then I realized it was the sound of the heart beat. I had to fight the tears so hard while the technician was still in the room. I was utterly grateful at that moment. She was a little trooper. She was holding on so tight. I knew it was her way of telling me ' mommy, I am still here'...

I have been a lucky person my entire life, not the winning the lottery type of luck, but I somehow always manage to get that little bit last minute luck. 

I didn't bond with V at the first. E and my mom fell head over heels in love with her at the first sight. I've been struggling with postpartum complications. It's getting much better now, but I am still not free from it yet. For a while my blood pressure was 200/100, my blood sugar level was all over the place, and my thyroid hormones was off the chart, which sent my anxiety level and my temper through the roof. But you should never ever underestimate evolution! When the motherly love comes, it comes in full force.

I often wonder what I have done to deserve a baby like V. To me she is simply perfect, exceeding my expectation in every way. You might think I sound shameless. I think I just got lucky :)


tbc...